Stick With Me

I think about my blog these days like an extra bedroom that needs tending to, but somehow I never get to. I can just close the door and walk away and it feels like it will go unnoticed. I have had a few complications with this pregnancy and the wait for this new arrival is feels like I'm standing over cold ice water waiting for it to boil. Other things go unattended as well for example, laundry. I just know after I have this baby and get everything caught up I'm going to pull that perfect maternity shirt out of a pile of fresh warm laundry and think,"Oh, yeah there's that shirt. Where has this been?" Which isn't too big of a problem because I'm not going anywhere anyway. Needless to say some of the usual essentials are going by the wayside.

Don't worry about us. People have been so good to bless us. I am seeing God's goodness in different little ways. God's timing is funny though. Shortly before everything got harry around here I made the commitment to be less negative. You know....half glass full and all that. Trusting in God's goodness. It seems we have been tested to the limits on this in so many different ways. During this time the school our kids go to twice a week has not been as easy as we hoped, a family member has had to deal with some health issues, and then there is just day to day life. Which can be rather messy at times, can't it?

The awesome thing about God is, he is sufficient. Life is messy and sometimes challenging at best. A relationship with the Lord does not guarantee a problem free life. Having a attitude were I am more trusting of God says," Okay, your God and I'm not in this situation. Show me how this is going to work out for my good and ultimately your glory." I haven't exactly nailed this attitude, but I continue to renew my commitment daily.

During this time of far and few between post, please know I have not lost my heart for moms and encouraging them. I am working on ideas for more interviews and I am looking forward to posting them in the new year. Even though the body is week right now there is more to come for Crazy Days of Mommyhood so please, please, please stick with me. With my commitment to see his active hand in my life I have been convicted that right now more than ever moms need to be encouraged that what their doing is so worth there investment for today and eternity.

copyright 2009

Leaving the Library

It's 3 o'clock in the morning and I just noticed my pants are on inside out and yet I sit here determined to write a blog. Pray for me ladies.

Being a very noticeably pregnant mother of four we get some attention when we are out and about. Getting comments here and there. Children are not the favored fashion accessory these days. More people aren't having them and many do not like to see them out in public. Especially when the family begins to resemble some type of field trip or daycare.

I was in our local library with my four kids and my youngest decides to act out. I pick her up and hold her as opposed to having her climb the shelves. Upon picking her up a fit broke out. At this point I'm thinking, wow, I better get out of here.

My other children were sitting at tables and looking at books. Said toddler was the only one misbehaving. I had to find one more book for one of my sons to check out. Which wasn't too hard because I had just picked up a book to look over when the fit began. Then, a tap, tap, tap on my shoulder.

"Excuse me miss. You really need to take your child and go. This is a library and she is being too loud," says a man I've never seen in my life.

"What!? I'm doing the best I can. I have four children here. Can you just cut me a break?"
says me, almost on the verge of tears and holding it back with all my unhealthy pride.

"Well this is a library and...."

"Wait a minute." I interrupt. "Do you even work here?"

Needless to say, he didn't. That's right, some random stranger had taken it upon himself to ask me to leave when the librarian denied his request to do so.

It was a frustrating evening and I felt a little peeved after the whole episode . I mean, after all, who did that man think he was? Then I remembered my kids were seeing all this unfold. How should I continue to react?

I wasn't rude to the man. I was firm, telling him I would leave after I found my book. After all, I hadn't planned on staying much longer. I didn't want to deal with a crying toddler as much as he didn't want to listen to one. I was barely handling this all in front of the watchful eyes of my three older ones.

I decided that I wanted family, our family, to prevail. People can say what they choose, but how I deal with it affects how my children view people and our family as a whole. After leaving, I calmed down, and we talked about how we should probably have sympathy for a man that cannot have empathy for women and children. In the end my oldest suggested we say a little prayer for him.

The lesson learned for me: I cannot control what others say to me or about me in front of my children. I can however, control the kind of impact it has on us. Now, I just feel sorry for that man and the childless world he chooses to live in.

copyright 2009

Okay, Okay I've Been Away Awhile

Okay, okay so I've been away awhile. I honestly had contemplated not writing on my blog anymore. I mean, after all, isn't the world filled with enough talking heads, story tellers, and blog writers. Aren't I just flooded out by the crowd? "Go big or go home," is today's slogan. I'm pregnant, tired, and dealing with all of life's going ons. So, why even try?

And yet.......God persists on my heart.

I had ladies ask when I was going to post another blog or I would read an article about blogging and it's affect on others. Now I'm reading the book Twelve Extraordinary Women by John Mac Arthur.
I was reminded of this verse:

Hebrews 11:39-40

These were all commanded for their faith, yet none of them received what had been promised. God had planned something better for us so that only together with us would they be made perfect.

Go big or go home, is not God's calling card. It's the world's. God's is faithfulness to the call. Faithfulness to the point that we believe in the vision God has given us more than seeing the results.

That in a nutshell is what Crazy Days of Mommyhood is about. Faithfulness to the roll of mommyhood and a celebration of the mommies that heed this roll and take it serious. Mommyhood is a thankless roll. The little people we love and care for are not going to produce anything big and grandiose today besides maybe messes. We care for them whatever the age because we keep the vision that God in his time will make perfect.

So...I will blog, not sure of what a little blog writing can do in the sight of eternity, but I enjoy it and the Lord has laid it on my heart to do it. I encourage the rest of you to be faithful at the little things as well as big and do what the Lord is nudging you to do.

copyright 2009

Superhero Training

I have been having crazy dreams at night about having super powers. It is actually a pretty awesome dream. I usually do something outstanding like super speed or shape shifting. I am able to solve common problems in a single bound. I have put some serious thought into it and in the end I think I would probably have to go with speed. I believe these dreams have something to do with being pregnant. Although, I'm not sure what? That's what I hear. I have had some pretty crazy dreams with the last pregnancies. I just can't remember being so excited about them or being so disappointed when I woke up.

Being a mom has given me some serious training in superheroes. Sure, when I was younger I had an older brother and was exposed to the Justice League, but it went in one ear and out the other. As a mom I am required to participate in conversations were I choose what superhero power I would want and why or which Incredible I would be. Which is always redundant because I will continue to be typed cast as the mother; Elastigirl. Even though I secretly would like to be Violet the daughter with force field and invisibility abilities.

I now feel like I am a dictionary full of resources on Superheroes. It is not just my sons that enjoy it, but my daughter as well. I have even at times slightly embarrassed myself in front of other moms with this wealth of knowledge insured by all of them.

For example: When pregnant with my fourth child I was invited to a pregnant mommies class. I had the upper hand on superhero education as most where either first time mommies or second with only a toddler. When introducing ourselves a mommy had mentioned her husband did all the sound and computer work for the church. To which I made the comment, "Oh, he is a technopath."

To which I laughed.....and only I laughed. It was a hard crowd because no courtesy laugh was extended. None of the other young moms knew YET that a technopath was the super power to control electronics. I mean, I didn't break down into complete scifi mode and introduce myself like Yoda. "Athena, I am. Nice to meet you, it is. Mommy I will be, of the fourth," and yet strange looks, I did receive.

It's okay because their turn's coming. As moms we are all submerged into some type of unexpected culture. Yours may not be science fiction or superheroes maybe it's having to learn all the names to the Doodle Bops or unwillingly memorize all the words to Jonas Brothers latest hits or God Bless you, maybe even have to sit through their "concert" on the big screen. So,I guess I would rather dream about being a superhero in my pregnant state then dream about something like living in that weird dome shaped house as a Teletubbie. Really, what are they anyway!? and do I need to dream about being any rounder than I already am?



copyright 2009

For Keeps

My oldest daughter is a kind, softhearted child. She helps with dishes. She will also help with odd and ends around the house occasionally without having to ask. However, walk into her room and it is a danger zone. I don't let the baby walk in there for fear of bodily harm. Keep in mind, I do not keep a spotless home, but we do require some resemblance of order.

I noticed very early on that she did not like to throw away anything. She would for example: have a piece of candy wrapper from a family outing. I would have picked it up from her floor and thrown it away. She would walk by the trash can and say something like, " What is this wrapper doing in the trash?" in a very pained sort of way. "You cannot throw it away I got this when we went to the movies. We really enjoyed that movie. How can I throw that away?" As if, I myself was rejecting the whole event by the simple action of throwing away the said wrapper.

I became somewhat of a student of this behavior when I was in my early twenties. I stayed with friends for a summer. In a act of good will I decided to clean out their refrigerator. I was proud of myself for taking on a task that most would avoid. After throwing out a few outdated and moldy items my friend became unglued. I was in shock. I came from the kind of people that followed the rule "When in doubt throw it out." I was truly clueless as to what I had done so offensive. All the emotion that could come from trying to throw out moldy salsa that I was forced to return to it's rightful shelf in the refrigerator, was lost on me.

I have had the benefit of observing different subjects over the years since then. I have made the connections genetically were my daughters hording tendencies come from. I was on the phone one day with my sweet sister-in-law when I admitted I do not hold on to birthday cards forever. Sure, I keep them out for awhile and I am always happy to receive any card that comes our way. However, I throw them out after a decent amount of time. She sounded sad and I regretted it instantly. With this conversation came the realization people who hoard attach memories and when they throw it away the memory just may go with it. I also recognized the kindred spirit that my daughter and her aunt share. The wanting to hold onto everything because someone or something special is associated with it. I understood why both my daughter and sister-in-law would give me things they thought I could "use" over the years. Which became a code word to me for: throw it out. But this connection to what may seem like stuff and clutter is an overflow of their sentimental, tender hearts.

While having the opportunity to study in my daughter the ability to hold on to tiny scraps of paper, cards, invitations, brochures, magazine clippings, church bulletins, memento cups, confetti dropped at midnight, and pictures of people we have long forgotten the name of because we barely knew them anyway, I do not believe I will ever truly get it. I do however, enjoy learning about my children and discovering their funny little quirks and idiosyncrasies. I'm not interested in mothering someone exactly like me. Recognizing and excepting our children's bent is what helps makes us good mothers and our young ones feel appreciated. So, to indulged her a little I think I will print this out and cram it into her large memento drawer.

Copyright 2009

Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread

It has been awhile since I picked up on this passage. It is all so beautiful and thought provoking, convicting and uplifting all at the same time. I once heard a Dr. Dobson interview with John Elderedge. Elderedge had worked at Focus On The Family with Dr. Dobson for sometime before quitting and writing Wild At Heart. Dobson told Elderedge that he noticed a significant growth in him and asked what it was. His reply to him I will never forget. He said, " I just got tired of living off of yesterdays manna."

Wow! How profound! It has been years since I heard that and still, it sticks with me.

Exodus 16:24
Each morning everyone gathered as much as he
needed, and when the sun grew hot, it melted away.

God wants to take care of our everyday physical and spiritual needs.

I grow concerned for our Christian moms and families that believe that a constant connection to our Lord and Savior is not a vital need in our Christian walk. How can we point our children to a Jesus we ourselves only know in a distant way? God providing manna for the Israelites is an excellent example of our need for the sustenance that only He has to offer.

Exodus 16:19-20
Then Moses said to them, "No one is to keep any of it until morning."
However, some of them paid no attention to Moses; they kept part of it until morning, but it was full of maggots and began to smell.

We were made for companionship with the Lord. He wants to be our daily bread. He wants to give us Himself everyday. It is amazing how often I am willing to live off of yesterdays smelly manna.

When we have our spiritual life in tune with Jesus the physical is more easily conquered. If we rely on Him everyday and problems occur, then we are going to go to the one we go to already. If we are calling on our mamma, our sister, or our friends everyday then that will be our go to in our weakness as well. All these people may be a great support system, but they will never be a anchor in a storm.


Ephesians 6:18
And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.


Psalms 32:6-7
Therefore let everyone who is godly pray to you while you may be found; surely when the waters rise, they will not reach him. You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance.

I want to encourage you as mothers and women to pray in every and all occasions. You are someone that can affect the future for the Lord. There is an old saying that says, "The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world." We can affect the kingdom of God without leaving our homes. "A righteous man's prayers availith much." Seek God for His daily bread and become the woman God meant for you to be changing yourself and the children you serve.

copyright 2009

Brand Name Wars

The problem that continues between my husband and I is simply; off brand food or name brand. Which is best?

I am in favor of Aldi. A smaller store where everything is off brand so it's a sure thing to save money. Some of the food I would even say, taste good. My husband on the other hand does not think we should have to suffer off brands. We should for example, really eat a Dorito not a imitation chip with a peculiar cheese after taste. Making our children eat off brand food is somehow in his mind, damaging their growing up experience and possibly their taste buds.

I became desensitized to this at a very young age. My parents were always on a very tight budget. I remember coming home from school and my mom announcing she had just been to the store for a big grocery trip. Walking to the pantry and opening up it's big wooden doors you would see yellow from top to bottom. Yellow boxes of cereal, yellow bags of chips, and many many yellow boxes of hamburger meals. Value Brand everything. So, in my mind for my own children to actually see food inside the box or on the outside of the can is a benefit all its own.

Getting used to the idea of being a larger family I broke down and went shopping at, you guessed it Sams. It was a good compromise for my husband and I. It is supposed to be cheaper and it is mostly name brand. I was a little overwhelmed at the thought of having to buy there for most of our groceries. I mean, is this really me shopping somewhere that large gathered boxes are needed not bags for my groceries? However, we are home all the time and go through plenty of food.

Walking through the isles I began to get a little excited. "Look! A whole box of granola bars. Oh, and there is a giant block of cheese."

The idea of not having to make multiple trips to the store in between big shopping trips took over. I was feeling the money we were saving going to something more meaningful like going out to eat.

The children were with me and the excitement soon spread. We made it to the condiment isle were I met my down fall. Three gallons of salad dressing. The kids thought we needed it. "But, we will never eat all that." I said

"Yes, we will mommy. We love salad."

"We never eat salad."

"We will." They pleaded.

Not only was Sams solving the grocery store issues between my husband and I, but quickly conforming us all into daily salad eaters. What a great place!

I brought my booty home feeling very satisfied with myself. "Look at all this stuff," I said to my husband. "I really think I saved us some money this time."

"Really? What's this?" he asked pointing to the two three gallons of dressing?

"Dressing. We are going to start eating more salad." Looking at his face even I no longer believed this line of reasoning.

Needless to say it's been almost two weeks and we haven't eaten any salads. What can I say? We got carried away in the moment. If it's between a whole cabinet of yellow boxes and some old dressing in the freezer I guess for the sake of peace I'd go with the dressing and maybe just maybe a little self-control.

copyright 2009

moms day

Mother's Day! A day we all love. Hopefully you were honored and blessed. I love to watch The Sunday Morning Show on Sundays. I was somewhat disappointed to see a story that they had on motherhood. The story told how hard motherhood is and we all feel as if we can't live up to the standard set, scene cuts to a image of Harriet Nelson and then June Cleaver giving advice and or vacuuming. A blog was mentioned where moms anonymously write in their guilt over mothering. An example given was biting of a child's nails instead of cutting them and other examples. Don't get me wrong, I think mothering is a hard job and I do think we should be able to talk to each other.

My disappointment is with this standard that is set by the world and the media and that we all bow down to that idea of femininity and motherhood and that we as mothers are never good enough. Instead of God's standard which I think some can feel, can be even more daunting. Let's take a closer look in Titus 2:3&4 " Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, but teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God."

What is amazing about God's design is there is a support system built in. Where one women comes in along another and teaches her how to mother and care for her family. It is always so helpful to me to hear other moms say, "I've been where you've been" or "I remember feeling the way you feel." Most importantly, "It will pass, be patient." The need to drudge up some false guilt over mothering is gone. The truth is we've all done crazy things. My kids are lucky if their fingernails get cut at all. But, where God is peace abounds.

The kind of relationship in Titus 2 takes time. It is coming along side each other and supporting each other. Young mothers need this and older moms need to be perpetuating this. Our job cannot be finished just because the nest is empty.

Pray with me that God would knit your heart to a fellow woman or a group of fellow women to care about and grow into motherhood with as God designed it. As mothers we influence every generation. Let's us purpose to set our standard to God's so that we may come along side our daughters as mothers and teach them well and He would be honored.

I hope you had a happy Mothers Day. Blessings on the job you are doing.

copyright 2009

Seventh Heaven???

I love that show. Kids everywhere, a mom that is perky and doesn't have quiet all the answers but just enough, a loving meddling dad; who wouldn't love that? Upon announcing we were pregnant with our fifth child our oldest son's immediate question was, "Does this mean we are going to have our own show now? "

Although he meant a reality show, my mind goes to Seventh Heaven. Isn't this a commentary on our day to day lives that television is always our first go to? I have to admit I loved the Cosby Show growing up. I wanted a family like that. Now that I am older it's Seventh Heaven. Although somedays around here it feels like Seven Heathens with kids fighting, laundry piled up, and finding the remote is our biggest goal for the day.

So why, why would we want another child? I have been asking myself this. With your first child there is all the excitement of the first time experiences, the second brings the opportunity to give your child a sibling, the third a given because there was three in my family. However with the fourth and now fifth it feels like complete insanity. I know there are those that say we consider each child a blessing and family a gift. The kind if women that look like a momma duck with all her ducklings following in some random parking lot. The thing is, somewhere along the way my husband and I became one of those "people". We had a softening of the heart and we prayed about it. We asked God his opinion and he continued to confirm his desires for our life.

I may not be Annie Camden and I will never be Claire Huxtable, but God is doing some amazing things with Athena these days. So, go ahead and ask me why five kids. I'll just say, "Children are a blessing and family a gift. Now please excuse me while I look for our remote."

copyright 2009

Homeschool Covention

We are all recouping from our state homeschool convention. It is an exciting place where you walk around and look at books and attend seminars for hours and hours and still come home and feeling as if there is something that you didn't see or get that is somehow pivotal to your school year ahead. Homeschool conventions can make those teetering on the edge of decisions complete converts. Also, reminds the rest of us why we do what we do. Homeschooling is something that most are convicted is the best thing for our kids. While doubt still lingers weather or not our children wouldn't be better in the hands of another each and everyday. Even going to the extent of threatening to send them anywhere else that would take them on crazy days. Yet, just two days of being around others that are in the same boat can be sooo amazingly encouraging. So, even if I have forgotten something I'm reminded I'm on the right path.

copyright 2009

Keep On Keeping On

I have been dragging and pushing our kids through the last few weeks of school and I'm building up a sweat from that alone. It seems everyday I have a conversation that goes something like, "Okay let's get our math books out. What do you mean you can't find your math book? Why isn't it in the bucket I so cleverly made for you? (We homeschool moms thrive on finding new inventive ways to organize.) Wait a minute were are you going? You cannot do math outside if you don't have your math book."

If you are someone who thinks homeschoolers have it all together I hope this little glimpse will show you, we don't. I think like every mommy we are ready for summer.

I have to admit that I get a little sentimental at the end of a school year. The year is over and one more step toward adulthood has been reached. Remind me of this when I'm ready to walk across the street to the elementary and enroll my kids.

I want to enjoy this summer as mommy not teacher. I am making a little mental note of what is important for this summer.

1. Do not over plan activities.

2. Enjoy your kids.

3. DO NOT OVER PLAN ACTIVITIES SO THAT YOU MAY ENJOY YOUR KIDS.

Push on moms we are almost there. I know you are counting the days. Summer is a great time to get caught back up with what is going on inside our kids' little minds. Also, to refresh ourselves and spend time with the Lord in prayer. We are on the homestretch so, keep on keeping on. Your doing great!!!

Have I Told You Latley That I Love You

I walked into my kitchen this morning to see my kids making me breakfast. I know, how sweet is that? Also, on the counter I see a present opened by one of my little ones that I had bought for my sister who is graduating college soon. What are you doing I asked? or better yet demanded. I wanted by dear sister who has worked so hard to graduate to be the very first one to open that gift. Somehow it took away from the gift that a little persons hands had messed with it. I wanted it packaged nicely the way the women at the store had done it.

We have this great rule in our house it is very simply. "If it's not yours do not touch it." I can ask any of our children. What's our rule? They will mumble, "If it's not yours don't touch it."

To which I usually carry on saying something like, "That's right if it's not yours don't touch it. It is a great rule. One of the best we have. If it's not yours don't touch it. (saying it over and over is my way of getting it to take) I love that rule. If it's not yours don't touch it. Please follow it next time."

A little too much drama is at times, my downfall as a mom. I missed the opportunity to praise my kids for thoughtfulness, putting someone else first, and working together. After all they had not had breakfast yet either. It is soooo much easier to do right the first time than to come back and apologize for blowing things out of proportion. I could have still dealt with the gift situation and it probably would have been more effective. Catching our kids at doing a good job is just as important as catching them misbehaving.

Ordianry Days Extodinary Moms Jyl Griffin On Homeschooling

Jyl Griffin is a homeschool mom to four kids. She has homeschooled for eight years. I love talking to other homeschoolers and getting tips on how they do things during their school days. I enjoyed having her share.




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We discussed several different types of curriculum. I have attached a few links for more information.

My Father's World

Bob Jones

Abeka

KONOS

Lapbooks

There are many ways to homeschool. Let us know how your schoolroom works.

Thank You Jyl.

Thy Will Be Done On Earth As It Is In Heaven

This was a hard one. How do you talk about God's will. It is a great thing when you are benefiting from God's blessing. But, how about when you are going through a time of suffering. We then question God's will in our lives. It is as though we believe we deserve his blessings and nothing else. This state of mind can be confusing causing us to stumble and believe that we are somehow out of God's will if any suffering at all takes place.

My heart was drawn to the thought that Jesus followed God's will unto death. I came upon a fellow blogger who I thought wrote most eloquently what was in my heart. He had taken a trip to the Holy Land and was brought face to face with the place Jesus was obedient to God's will.

"In the garden I reflected on the fact that by the time Jesus arose from his knees and surrendered to the kiss of betrayal and the soldier's military might -- Jesus had settled the matter of the cross in his heart. The will of that Father had become the will of the Son. It was here that Jesus accepted the Father's will and faithfully chose the way of suffering.

In choosing the will of the Father -- his atoning death on the cross Jesus agonized in prayer. Luke's gospel specifically mentions Jesus' "anguish" or "agony" (using the Greek word agonia, which can also mean "struggle"). In the other Gospels Jesus explains that He is "deeply grieved, even to death" (Mark 14:34; Matt 26:38). Those gospels also show Jesus as praying more than once before He was ready to accept the Father's will. His prayer time at Gethsemane was anything but peaceful and serene.

Throughout this journey through the last days of Jesus on earth we will see and feel the struggles, the agony and the humble surrender of our Savior. In this way we experience a deeper appreciation for the complexity of Christ's nature as both God and man. In Gethsemane, perhaps more than in any other scene of the Gospels, we see the fully human Jesus, the One who "in every respect has been tested as we are, yet without sin" (Hebrews 4:15).

I am blessed by this reminder that Jesus understands when we are tested, when we are weak, when we aren't sure we want God's will for our lives. I am encouraged to know that Jesus knows our every weakness, and He is there to help us in our time of trial."

fullydevoted.blogspot.com

God's will being done on earth as it is in heaven means God's will is complete. It has eternal ramifications. The benefit of God's will being accomplished is that glory focused on God through both thanksgiving and suffering.

Thank you Jesus!!

Ordinary Days Extraordinary Moms Amy's Testimony on Courtship

I had the privilege of interviewing my good friend Amy. She and her husband Rob had the blessing of experiencing courtship prior to their marriage. It is an extraordinary story and I hope you are blessed listening to their testimony as she shares it.



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Push Through

It is very deceiving outside. The sun is shining but the high is somewhere close to 40 degrees. Still, spring fever has set in and pushing through to finish up homeschool is getting very hard. The kids want to play outside. Spring weather is very promising for the end of the week. Maybe, by Easter it will be nice.

This was our first full year of homeschooling. I have to admit, I have been a very reluctant homeschooler. Hoping and believing they would all be back in school next year. By early January I had the school picked out and everything. I was already visualizing a clean house and caught up laundry. Then the bubble burst. I prayed about it. I mean really prayed about it. I knew in my gut we were supposed to do one more year.

I had had a few conversations with people that went something like this prior to prayer...

"You, homeschool? Oh, I could never do that. You must really enjoy it. I mean that is really a calling. How many kids do you have?"

My reply....

"No, actually I don't enjoy it." (If I'm anything, it's honest.) "We are NOT going to be doing this next year. I've found a great school for us that is going to be the perfect fit. I'm not like most other homeschool moms that love it. It was just for this year."

Just as the weather is deceiving us today I too had deceived myself into believing what I wanted was best for all of us. Instead God's best is what we needed for each of us. It was a pretty amazing thing though, I received such a peace after the decision was made to go one more year. (I can only think that far ahead.) The house can wait. I've witnessed that this year. However, growing children do not.

So, I'm going to push on through to summer and then wade into next fall. Who knows maybe by then I'll be a full fledged homeschool convert.

Your Kingdom Come

Two brothers visited the United States with their spouses. The older brother set up shop, had a family, and settled down. He became a student of the culture and he and his family devoured it. They learned the language, forgot their old outdated customs even changing their way of dress. Soon they blended and he applied for a green card.

The younger brother remembered it was only a temporary situation. He settled enough to have a family but, always spoke of their true home to his children. After all they had never been there. Not, only did he speak of it to his children but, to people around him. The connection to his homeland was so strong within him it could not be snuffed out by anyone. Being around him was to breath in the younger brothers culture. Unlike his older brother he never forgot his current residence was only temporary. He knew he would one day be going home.

The amazing thing about the idea of the kingdom of God is that it doesn't just exist after we die. It exist now, today. We as Christians are citizens of the kingdom of God. I have to admit somedays I am like the older brother breathing in the culture changing my ways to fit the world around me. Other days I am like the younger one focusing on the eternal kingdom. But, to be able to do that all the time we have to have the mind set of "Thy Kingdom Come".

A simple word search in the book of Matthew shows the word kingdom 53 times. I'm thinking this is a concept we should be getting our heads around. The thought that our body was made for the moment but our hearts and souls for eternity. Part of living for an imperishable kingdom is breathing in our own "culture". Do we even know our own culture? Most of all, are we afraid to live it out?

The best place to start is in God's word. If you want to know God's customs and ways of doing things seek him out. Then, let's not be afraid to live it out. Remember you are a daughter of the king.

Oh, the Horror

My baby, my little sweet girl as been neglected. By of all people, her parents. She has....ringworm. Oh, the horror. I feel like I need a bath just writing it down. It makes me feel so dirty. It is comparable to telling people you have lice. We have no clue were she got it from. What's worse it's all over her tush which is why we let it go so long. We were treating it as diaper rash. I can see it right now, me in the doctors office with the doctor questioning my ability to parent a child, let alone four. We are trying natural and over the counter remedies. We will see.

It's amazing how God can take anything and teach a lesson from it. I can't help but to think if there are little sins in my life that I wouldn't tell anybody until it got so out of control I had no choice. For example how often would you share something like..."Today I yelled and yelled at my kids until the youngest one cried and the older ones just shut down completely." Something we as mothers would probably not share, even with a close friend. But, if someone else told us that and then asked you to pray with them would you maybe think yourself the better parent? Or would you relate and admire her boldness to expose her own flaws? Sin is eventually exposed,if to no one else, our children.

TODAY MY PRAYER IS THAT GOD WOULDN'T EXPOSE ME, BUT MOLD ME.

By the way any of you way knowledgeable moms know any natural remedies for Ringworm, please send it my way!!!!!!

Hallowed be Thy Name

My kids and I have been memorizing and studing the Lord's Prayer in school. It is a beautiful prayer and I thought I would go over it in my blog too because I have been getting so much out of it. Memorizing any scripture is awesome. God's word will never return void. I learned the prayer in a public school, if you can believe that. I had an old school teacher that said we were going to recite it everyday and there was nothing anybody could do to stop her. I still hear the Lord's Prayer in that old ladies voice when I say it out loud. God bless her. I'm sure she has gone on to be with the Lord. Now it is our turn to pass it on.

The first two lines in the Lord's Prayer are "Our Father in heaven, allowed be your name." Matt 6:9. This can be a little humbling. I mean, how many of us go to the Lord with our want list when we pray. Sounding something like this, "God, you know me and I have such a limited time for you. Please take care of little Jojo and Mary. Also, please change my husband you know he needs it. Also, whatever else it is I'm suppose to be praying about for my friend from church. Amen"

In verse eight of chapter six, in Matthew, the last thing Jesus says is God knows what we need before we ask and the first thing he starts out with in prayer is praise to God. Maybe, we make the mistake of forgetting that he is always with us, so if we aren't keeping him up to date on our lives we think he won't know. In the last chapter in Matthew, last verse Jesus says, "..and surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

Starting out with praise in our prayer time reminds us that He is God and we are not. I grew up in the Pentecostal Holiness church. I once heard a praise and worship leader describe his idea of what took place with congregational worship. A usual service would first play up beat music or "praise" and then slower more chorus type music "worship". He viewed "praise" as entering the outer court and "worship" as entering into the holy of holies. I think this is a beautiful way to be reminded that through Jesus we are welcomed into God's very presence. A place that before his sacrifice on the cross, only few went. If this is the only thing you thank God for in your prayer time. Your good.

If you have trouble getting started in this area open your Bible and take a look at the Psalms.

Psalms 27:1,4&5

The Lord is my light and my salvation-
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the stronghold of my life-
of whom shall I be afraid?

One thing I ask of the LORD,
this is what I seek:
that I may dwell in the house of the
LORD
all the days of my life
to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD
and to seek him in his temple.

David wanted to always be in God's presence. You can see as you read on that through praise, he worked out his struggles being confident that God was in his day to day affairs.

For in the day if trouble
he will keep me safe in his dwelling;
he will hide me in the shelter of his
tabernacle
and set me high upon a rock.

Sincere praise changes our view of God and his role in our lives.

Live, Laugh, Love

I was going to start this post with, it's early in the morning, I have a cup of coffee in hand, and the house is quiet. That is how I planned to sit and write on my blog this morning. However, the baby woke up, it's 8 o'clock and the others are playing there DS enjoying a little break from school. I do have a warm coffee though. It's the little things that please us.

Having kids makes us enjoy the little things. The essentials we'll say. For example: sleeping, going to the bathroom,taking showers. Maybe the "essentials" is why people are willing to pay five dollars for a cup of coffee. You know, the truth is, I wouldn't change it. True, I would like more showers, but now I truly am thankful for them and if left in there long enough, miss the craziness of it all. Or at the very least feel sorry for leaving my husband alone with the natives.


Kids are great and they add such a dynamic to a household that one can never dream of before hand. In putting some thought into this, I came up with a list of ten things I never thought I would hear myself say before kids.


1. When is the last time I showered?

2. When is the last time you showered?

3. Is it okay to wear to Wal-Mart what I slept in last night?

4. I think I have adjusted to the smell.

5. Never, never put something from your nose in mommy's mouth or anybody else.

6. I love you, but back up from me for a few seconds while mommy counts.

7. I never even imagined that I would ask for a description of bodily fluids. Although, this does come in handy during sick season.

8. Are you sure you want them to spend the night? I know you are the grandparent but, it's a lot of work.

9. What's in your mouth? Should we call poison control?

10. Yes, she is growling. We are trying to teach her not to do that.


It is a great time of life. After all, a cheerful heart does the soul good like a medicine. When I loose the ability to laugh then I become out of focus. If there is something you've said you never imagined either, let me know.

Ordinary Days Extraordinary Moms Surrogate Mom Trisha Taylor Interiew

This interview with Trisha was a true delight. Trisha is a homeschooling mommy to four. She is also a fellow blogger at oklahomataylors.blogspot.com. When I heard she had been a surrogate I knew I wanted to interview her for Crazy Days Of Mommyhood. I know you all will enjoy listening to her too.



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Recycled Encouragement

I posted a blog about a month back "I Don't Want to Be Famous Anymore." I mentioned someone that had encouraged me before we had kids. The Lord laid it on my heart to contact her and let her know what she had meant to me and my philosophies on motherhood. I have not talked to this person in about four years. I went to the Lord again in prayer wondering if I heard right. It is always easier to appreciate someone from afar, then to tell them and hear something like "Who are you again?" I mean, who wants to know that? The person I admired could not even recall my name. I didn't.

I set out to track down a number, e-mail, or something. I thought I remembered something about getting a number, but again it had been awhile. I made a week attempt to ask someone on Facebook for info. Predictable, I heard nothing. To which I assumed I had tried and God would most certainly be satisfied. To the contrary, I was cleaning and rearranging our homeschool area and opened a file that had been collecting dust for about a year or so. In it contained a church bulletin with her number, address, and e-mail. Okay, God okay. Arrogantly, I assumed she must really need my encouragement right now.

I ended up calling her. She was very gracious and glad I called. She asked for all my information. One day this week I received a family picture and newsletter from her. When I took out the picture and saw the family of nine, I got it. You see, they were about the age we are now when we first met them. There oldest is now 21. It was another life time ago when we were young newlyweds and thought homeschooling and large families were a little cooky. We are now cooky ourselves, homeschooling our brood of four. I looked at the photo and was encouraged to know the children I am raising today, will one day be the adult that through Gods grace, I can admire in the future. I needed that because as you may have read it has been a little crazy lately. I am so thankful that God continued to press me to obedience.

WOW, My First Audio Blog!!!!!!

Hey, I am so excited to post my first audio blog today. I look forward to this being the first of many. We all know extraordinary moms living our their ordinary days in such an amazing way for Christ. This is one way I can highlight them to encourage all of you. So keep checking back for more interviews.

I interviewed my mother, Brenda Young. She is a 56 year old wife, mother, daughter and artist that has recently moved in with her aging parents. She is a Life Casting artist that has created pieces for well known ministries and is currently working on pieces for some nonprofit agencies in the Oklahoma City area.

In true form of Crazy Days of Mommyhood we bribed the children to be quiet while we figured out modern technology. So, if you hear children in the back ground every once in a while it's because I'm a mom, and that's the way it goes.



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Count Me In

Sometimes I let the everydayness of life carry me away to the point of neglecting my time with the Lord. Spending time in prayer and focus on Jesus and his hand print in my life.

My husband and I sat down together on the couch one day this week after he had gotten home from work. I have to admit I have been pressuring him for a little more "face time". After running out of things to say he asked, "So, what has your quiet time been like lately?" A question he has never asked me in our almost 14 years of marriage. I panicked a little. I thought maybe he had noticed.

"Why do you ask?" was my most holiest of replies. A little self conscious thinking I must have applied to much pressure for "face time" being convicted for two things at once.

I said to myself and him what most of us say. "Yeah, I need to do that." I hadn't been making that connection with God and at the moment my soul needed it. A day or so later I received an IM from a friend that asked me to pray and on top of that, requested me to read a certain scripture too. I said I would, because after all isn't that what a "good Christian" would say? The Holy Spirit had used my husband and a friend to hold me accountable. Accountable to the point that it brought me to the Lord in prayer and repentance. I started that prayer praying for someone else but ending it in seeking forgiveness for myself.

We need accountability. We need to have it and give it to others. If we are creating for ourselves comfortable relationships were nobody is challenged and no one is moving forward in our walk with the Lord than we become stagnet Christians. We live in a world were everyone goes unchallenged. The Bible says over and over again to encourage each other. Col 2:2 My purpose is that they may be encouraged in heart and united in love, so that they may have the full riches of complete understanding, in order that they may know the mystery of God, namely, Christ.

We cannot serve our families as mothers on an empty tank. My purpose this week is to know Him better and encourage others to do the same with me. So, What's your quiet time been like lately?

Mommy Wise

Okay, it has been a crazy two weeks in my house. Now, being a homeschooler we have to get back on track from those weeks and get back into school. On top of everything else we have not been able to do school. It would have been nice these past few weeks to have sent at least two of them to school instead of having to juggle everyone at doctors appointments and with grandparents. But, you have to take the bad with the good and still, homeschooling is our choice.

Having said that. I am having mommy burnout. I love my kids and our choices but wow, what I wouldn't do for a warm beach and a good book somewhere far away. Making meals and taking care of sick kids can be very overwhelming. I think some moms just slowly go inward when stressed out. Others maybe denial or shopping. I think in the realm of Christianity we feel that it is a sign of a bad mother to say I am stressed out and I don't want to be a mommy or maybe even a wife anymore today. So, what do we do from there? We move on, not from motherhood or marriage, but from those feelings. Recognize they are just feelings and although very valid, feelings change.

First, I would ask is burnout stemming from a legitimate issue? Are you never alone? Do you need support in a way your not getting it? Look into that. Then, don't be afraid to try something new. Above all do not feel guilty for it.

Second, realize motherhood is hard and give yourself a break. Realize sometimes your husband does not know what to do either. Wade through it together.

Sometimes its right there in front of our faces, other times it feels as if it is gone like flowers in winter, but know this, God is faithful to complete the good job he started in and through you.

Baby Wise?

Hey Moms, a little advice please!!

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Ok, here's the situation. I've been trying to do the whole "Baby Wise" thing with Caleb - you know, keeping him on a schedule. His schedule is he eats every two hours and sleeps every two hours. And all you "Baby Wise" moms will probably get after me for this, but he uses a bottle to get to sleep for naps. This is the only way I can get him to sleep without a HUGE cry out! And I mean HUGE!! So, alas, I let him have his bottle and fall asleep. However, lately he doesn't always fall asleep and then I'm up a creek and he won't go to sleep. I know some of you think I should just lay him in his crib and let him cry it out (namely, my mother), but I just can not do it. I can let him fuss, but it turns into a huge temper tantrum. So, if he just drifted off to sleep I could do that, but it never does. It always turns into something awful that lasts FOREVER and I can't do it.

My theory is that although Baby Wise is a good thing to go by, not all babies are going to go along with it perfectly. Some better than others.

So, what advice can you Moms give me on this? OH, and another thing, when he does go down for a nap it's for 45 minutes and then he wakes up. He gets like 2 and if I'm lucky, 3 of these 45 naps a day. A little side note, I think he might be teething, which could be playing a role in this... Am I expecting too much sleep? I think he's not sleeping enough during the day. Ideally I would like him to take like 2 big naps a day... HELP!!! I'm very frustrated!
Thx!

By Krista Grien

A cry out by a worn out mommy. We all know the days. What do we think though? How close do we stick to a book that claims precious slumber for our little ones if we will just follow their directions. I know moms that love Baby Wise. I know others that would not sell their copy in a garage sale. What do you think? Should Krista feel guilty for not following their rules?

Update on Ben

This is an update for our boy Ben.

Thank you to everyone who prayed for us and our whole family. It has been a chaotic week and I will not tell you I felt peace the whole time. I did however feel everyone's prayers and knew that whatever happened God was still God. I was reminded that He never gets tired or cranky. Reminded in my imperfectness He is always perfect.

On Wednesday night Ben came home with swelling on the inside of his right knee. We weren't sure if it was maybe broken, a infection, or just what. We knew whatever it was he would either be better or the same in the morning.

Thursday- We took him to the pediatrician where we were then sent to St. Francis Day Hospital. We spent the day there running all sorts of test. We found out that he had a cyst on his knee.

We had a appointment on Monday to see a Ortho Surgeon. God gave us grace with a very cranky surgery schedule for a Tuesday surgery.

I need to add, at this point we were a little concerned because we had heard this kind of cyst was somewhat abnormal. So the sooner the better with scheduling.

Tuesday- The surgery went as well as it possible could. He went under well and the doctor was able to get the cyst and it looked normal. It has been sent of to pathology but, we think that should be fine.

Thursday- Pathology report back cyst is benign.

My family was blessed by everyone that helped with the other three kids and by everyone that lifted us up in prayer. It is at moment like this we are reminded once again at how precious our little ones are. I was thankful to have the time with just my Ben to lay next to him and take care of him. All you moms with several kids know what I mean. It was a precious time and I am relieved it is over.

Valentine Shmalentines

I did not wake up this morning to doves overhead or a little naked baby hanging in the air with his arrow. I woke up to one child with a hurt knee, possible requiring a small surgery and a sick toddler. I recalled a question my daughter had asked me earlier this week she asked, "What did you want to be when you grew up when you were a little mommy?"
To which I quickly replied, "I wanted to be a mommy."
She thought and asked, "Did you know that you wouldn't be paid for that job?"
My husband and I heard the question and we just looked at each other with a shrug and little laugh.

But, it's true mothers aren't paid. We could agree on something cute like, we get paid in hugs and kisses. But, then we would also agree on days like today when "sick" is going around the house, I don't particularly want a kiss and I'm pretty sure I do not even want a hug. I would rather be paid in actual dollars. Not boogers and viruses. That way, maybe I could go on a date with my husband and cupid wouldn't even have to come. The excitement of eating at a table for two would be enough.

I used to think in the early days of motherhood, "Lord, Do you see me here!? I am struggling! Send someone to help. FAST! An angel, a friend, even a stranger will do."

The Lord brought these verses to my heart in those early days.
Psalms 27:13-14
I am still confidant of this:
I will see the goodness of the LORD
in the land of the living.
Wait for the LORD;
be strong and take heart
and wait for the LORD.

At the beginning of this chapter David says if my parents leave me, if everyone is gone. I will wait and trust in His goodness. I was encouraged and a little convicted by this. In the Bible I see a steadfastness in times of trouble. I'm reminded of Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego when they said "If we live or if we die. We will not bow down."

Time has passed since my oldest were little and I still do not look forward to stomach viruses and colds. Valentines Days that go by with little fanfare will never be fun. After all I'm still a girl. However, this is my job and I will stand and see the goodness that the Lord will provide in and through my children. I will choose to be strong and wait to see His goodness in the lives of my children. Being a mom isn't easy. I do love the kisses and hugs but, I do it because I'm investing in something that counts. We as women will put all the time and hard work into college and then our career. Why wouldn't we give the same to motherhood? Our families deserve. Even though we are not getting paid we are still making an investment in our children and ultimately the Kingdom of God.

Help Wanted

It seems I hear of someone we know losing a job at least, once a week. It can be very scary. The loss of control that we feel can be overwhelming. My parents where in real estate during the 80’s, when we had the last recession. Real estate was a horrible business to be in at the time. It got so bad we eventually lived in a house without electricity for a time. When I think of the possibility of my husband going without a job I almost go into a panic. The thought of my children living in a house without utilities. What would I do? How did my mother handle it?
We ended up living with my grandparents for a season. As a child I didn’t care. It seemed like somewhat of an adventure. My grandparents had some land and a trampoline and I thought it was a great arrangement . Looking back now I see that it was a memorable experience because my great-grandmother was also living with my grandma. I’m sure all the adults didn’t think it was so great. However, for a short period of time we all had the blessing of living with four generations under one roof. Not very many people can say that in this day in age.
I had thought about writing ideas for saving money and cutting corners during a job loss or pay cut. I’m opting for words of encouragement. It is in times of crisis we need to remind each other who we are in Christ. We need this daily, sometimes hourly, and moment by moment even. Let times of trial remind us, that this world is temporary.
We have a place prepared for us that loss of jobs, illness, and strife cannot enter into. Until that time Jesus wants us to know we can still trust him.
So, what can we as women, wives, and mothers do to help.

1. Stand in the gap. During a time of hardship for our husbands. We need to stand in the gap of prayer. Go to the father on their behalf in prayer. In the book of Nehemiah the walls of Jerusalem had been destroyed. Nehemiah calls out to the Lord, “O Lord, let your ear be attentive to the prayer of this servant and to the prayer of your servants who delight in revering your name.” 1:10 He called out to the Lord in prayer before anything else. He made a plan during a time of rebuilding so that the city was not available to further destruction. At that time I also said to the people, “Have every man and his helper stay inside Jerusalem at night, so they can serve as guards by night and workman by day.” Neither I nor my brothers nor men nor the guards with me took off our clothes; each had his weapon, even when we went for water.” 4:22, 23 They were always on guard. They wanted their city protected. We can do the same for others helping make them stronger in their weakened state by being vigilant and standing in the gap. Prayer should be our first weapon of defense.

2. Be his helper. Gen 2:18 The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable.” In my Bible it says one of the things Eve is best known for, is completing the human pair. During hards times what can you do to help? Can you help answer hard questions to the kids? Is there someone or something that is usually difficult for him that you could be a buffer from? When things are difficult pray and watch for ways to complete him and be a help meet.

3. Trust God. My favorite verses about trusting the Lord are in Psalms Some trust in chariots some trust in horses, but we trust in the name if the LORD our God. They are brought to their knees and fall, but we rise up and stand firm. 20:7,8. No one likes change. Remember we serve a God that never changes. He can be trusted. If your husband comes to you and says he has an idea for big career change that he has been praying about, trust him. Trust that your husband can make the right decision. There has been times when I have trusted in chariots and horses in my life. Let us use this time to remind ourselves that we can rise up and stand firm.

My prayers go out for all of you that are suffering from job loses during this time. It may not be the plan you had, but who knows maybe your children will look back at this time 20 years from now and count themselves blessed.

Hooray For Diffendoofer Day

This is an excerpt from a Dr. Seuss book. "Hooray for Diffendoofer Day". It was published after he died, actually Jack Prelutsky a poet and Lane Smith the illustrator helped finish a book he had originally started. I feel in love with this little book. As a homeschool mom I'm always wondering are they getting it? Are they were they should be accidemically? This book imbraces different approaches and I found that so encouraging.

I want to keep this little book. It's funny when I get a great book from the library I love that other children have checked it out and for a few weeks it was their favorite too. I just want to keep it for myself and buy it from the library. That is why used book sells are so great. I don't think the library encourages keeping them.

Mr. Lowe appeared and howled,
"Attention, girls and boys!"

He began to fuss and fidget,
Scratch and mutter, sneeze and coough.
He shook his head so hard, we thought
His eyebrows would come off.
He wrung his hands, he cleared his throat,
He shed a single tear,
Then sobbed, "I've something to announce,
And that is why I'm here.

"All schools for miles and miles around
Must take a special test,
To see who's learning such and such-
To see which school's the best.
If our small school does not do well,
Then it will be torn down,
And you will have to go to school
In dreary Flobbertown."

"Not Flobbertown!" we shouted,
And shuddered at the name,
For everyone in Flobbertown
Does everything the same.

It's miserable in Flobbertown,
They dress in just one style.
They sing one song, they never dance,
They march in single file.
They do not have a playground,
and they do not have a park.
Their lunches have no taste at all,
Their dogs are scared to bark.

Miss Bonkers rose. "Don't fret!" she said.
"You've learned the things you need
To pass that test and many more-
I'm certain you'll succeed.
We've taught you that the earth is round,
That red and white make pink,
and something else that matters more-
We've taught you how to think."

"I hope you're right," sighed Mr. Lowe.
He shed another tear.
The test is in ten minutes,
And you're taking it right here."

We sat in shock and disbelief.
"Oh no!" we moaned. "Oh no!"
We were even more unhappy
Than unhappy Mr. Lowe.
But then the test was handed out.
"Yahoo!" we yelled. "Yahoo!"
For it was filled with all the things
That we all knew we knew.

That is just a little excerpt from Dr. Suess "Hooray for Diffendoofer
Day"

I Don't Want to Be Famous Anymore

I’m a wife to a great man and mother to four beautiful children, I am Athena. It seems at times this is all I am; a wife and a mother. I get up I make coffee, I change a baby’s diaper, I teach school, I get a shower on days that I am lucky and I move from my day to day life in what seems like a mundane way, at times. I have actually had someone not recognize me without all my kids. The comment made to me was “You look so much younger without your kids.”

Who says that?

It’s easy when your in your early 30’s to sing the song of “Is This all There Is?” I know, thirty is the new twenty and all that jazz but, I believe that 30 is just that, 30. I did everything the traditional way. I married young and had kids young. However, I do believe it is the age of self discovery and becoming comfortable in ones own skin. I remember walking through a book store one day with the aroma of coffee in the air and a vanilla tea in my hand when I realized “I no longer care about being famous.” I only cared about being known to myself. For me becoming more comfortable in my skin was knowing that I had value because of who I was in Christ as a christian, no longer needing the accolades of men. For a homeschool mom of four this was crucial moment of growth.

My husband and I married young, we were impulsive and no one stood in our way, so we married. Getting married young for two impulsive kids was a good thing. It protected us from ourselves and further bad decisions. Not that getting married was a bad thing it is just challenging at 18 and 19. We both started to go to church regularly in Stillwater, where my husband went to school. We fell in with a group of young marrieds many, of whom we continue to be friends with to this day.

During this time we were taken under different peoples wing. We were invested in as adults and not children. One couple named the Spillmans loved us. Eileen was the wife and she would share little honest bits of truths with me about life. They at the time had six kids. What I really enjoyed about her is she never tried to put a perfect face on raising a large family. It just was what is was: hard, but worth it. We were learning to be adults with others our age and guided by those further down the road. A few of the couples we had come to love were homeschoolers. The seeds of interest were being planted before we even had our own children. We watched from a distance.

Parenthood did come though, one week before graduation. I thought to myself “What am I going to do now.” It hadn’t been that long since I’d graduated highschool but, I felt I was slowly loosing my own identity. I wasn’t that cute little cheerleader from Bethany High School anymore. Then 13 months later I had our second child.

My mom’s comment to me was “Oh, Athena!”

Nobody was appreciating me for being pretty, or saying really witty things. Baby’s cannot talk and they do not care about pretty. I was officially an adult and was up to my elbows in poopy diapers and babies.

Before too long we had to decide what we would do for school with our own little brood. Homeschooling was the choice we had felt lead to. I had become excited in the process, picking out books, going to the homeschool fairs were encouragement abounds, and buying all the other supplies. I was excited until, I actually started school and realized, this is hard. Especially with an ADHD child I had no idea what to do with.

The next year I ran to the closest private school and gladly enrolled the two school age children.
This was a perfect plan, until they too had no idea what to do with her either. Once again the self pity fell like rain. What was I going to do? I hated homeschool. I pulled up my bootstraps and we all got to work and gradually we all started to enjoy it and find our way. The Lord made it all work out for both mine and my child’s good.

I prayed and I parented and somewhere along the way I learned who I was. I no longer need to hear how great I am from others. I still think I’m a little charming at times, and I appreciate that about myself. I can be a very good friend to other women and to my husband. Most importantly I know that family and parenthood is something I chose not something that just happened to me. I have been molded by my Lord I serve and the road he put me on. I love the idea that 30 years from now I will look around my dinner table at Thanksgiving and when we hold hands to pray, the circle will be wide, because like my friend Eileen Spillman I will know it was hard but, worth it.

PeePee Pants in the Morning

This morning I was reading about the Titus 2 women and then wondered over to Proverbs 31 women also. I sometimes have a hard time connecting, it seems like such a tall order at 7:00 in the morning. When my laundry is behind, I need to get the kids moving toward school, and I am positive that my baby is going to have to be completely changed out of peepee cloths because her diaper has probably leaked again. Then, I hope it's just peepee. Anyway, so then I remember a conversation my sister and I had about how I don't have to hang my head in shame before God. He didn't love me first to manipulate me into being a supermom. He just wants to love me and then love others through me as a result of that. Including my kids and husband. That doesn't seem like such a hard thing. Peepee pants or not.

Fireproof

Joshua son of Nun and Caleb son of Jephunneh, who were among those who had explored the land, tore their clothes and said to the entire Israelite assembly, "The land we passed through and explored is exceedingly good. If the Lord is pleased with us, he will lead us into that land, a land flowing with milk and honey, and He will give it to us. Only do not rebel against the Lord. And do not be afraid of the people of the land, because we will swallow them up. Their protection is gone, but the Lord is with us. Do not be afraid of them."
Num 14:6-9

Today I was listening to an interview with the producer of "Fireproof". The Interviewer was pushing him to see if a "Fireproof 2" was going to come out next after such success with the first one. The producers reply was that he didn't know and wanted to wait on God. What struck me the most was that he said, "We are not going to go ahead of God, or work behind him. We are going to wait on his timing."

How awesome is that. Not being fearful of waiting on God. But, then moving when he says go. I read this passage about Joshua and Caleb and it convicts me. I mean these Israelite s had it in their hands and they were fearful because it was too big for them. But, these two young men would go against them all and say,Yes, we can. What God has for us is good we just have to trust him.

My prayer tonight is that I would trust him and wait on or act on what he says is good with the same intensity as Joshua and Caleb.

The Journey

So, we've journeyed through the last few days together as a family on our dairy and gluten free diet and we are surviving so far. Although, I did demand my husband get out and retrieve us a cheese burger late last night. He said no. I can't help but to wonder what he is eating at work. I can just see him now stopping by Wendy's to get a Frosty. Ice cream, his weakness. While I am here reading labels and trying to come up with new recipes for my family. It's not so bad we'll just never eat out again that's all. However, we are starting to see small yet significant differences in the child that needs it most while also learning that another one is not having reactions but is just actually a little bit ornery. Which means on top of a new diet we also get to engage in character development. Parenthood is great! Now I'm having visions of Steve Martin with somewhere between four and twelve kids acting like it's no sweat. Well baby, if I don't get some cheese soon I may be sweaten it a little. I had just about convinced myself that a little junk in the trunk from the holidays was okay and that walking up and down my steps a few times a day would suffice for exercise. Yet I will be dedicated to the journey we have started, at least while the children are around. Afterall, it is a new year and last night the diet needing child said something I've never heard before, "Mom, I thought about what you were saying and you were right and I was wrong." Need I say more?